Board Thread:Fun and Games/@comment-27324018-20151211222735/@comment-101.165.3.159-20160412172417

Day 1 – War Theatre 

“You wanted to see me, General?” Rodney inquired.

“Yes, you know the Attero device intended to stop the Wraith from using their hyperdrives through-out the entire galaxy?” said the General.

“Yes…yes the Lantern device that distrupts wraith hyperdrive technology…what about it?” Rodney replies, nodding.

“Good, I want you to re-configure the Attero Device to distrupt Star wars (Imperial ships) from entering Hyperspace. That should permanently strand every imperial ship all through-out the entire galaxy.” He ordered.

“Uh sure…that will take me a day. Maybe even less if someone is threatening me with citrus,” Rodney answers, shivering in reminiscence.

“Perhaps I should order the chefs in the mess hall to make citrus salad?” The general replies dryly.

“Uh no…that’s fine, the Attero Device will be ready within the hour!”



Day 2 – War Theatre

“The Attero Device is ready, General!” Rodney mumbles out.

“Good, before we activate it, I want you to build the Arcturus power generator in a remote area of the Star Wars galaxy. Cloak the facility if you have to for maximum security.” The General ordered firmly.

“But the Arcturus Project didn’t pan out. If we activate it, the power generator will overload due to exotic particles being released and destroying the very fabric of reality!” Rodney responds, horrified.

“That is the point. The entire Star Wars galaxy will be destroyed from the overload. Make no mistake McKay, we are at war. Sure we can win with our fancy tech but the imperial fleet outnumbers us which makes the outcome of this war uncertain which is not acceptable.” The General replied.

“We can use Atlantis to destroy an entire imperial fleet? We can build replicators and unleash them on their galaxy? What about calling in the Ascended Ancients to cash in that favor and destroy them? Our Daedalus-class ships alone are vastly superior in terms of shields, weapons and hyperspace technology compared to theirs!” Rodney implored, looking pale.

“Sure we can throw all that and probably destroy the Imperials which would take time, but why go to all the trouble when we can go with my awesome plan?” The General droned.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Nooooo, please don’t make me blow up a ''Galaxy! ''It was bad enough when I blew up an entire solar system…people wouldn’t let me hear the end of it even after 6 months!” Rodney protested loudly.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Mmmm I have a craving for Citrus marinated chicken,” The general said, smacking his lips.

<p class="MsoNormal">“I’ll have the Arcturus device built within the hour using Asgaard matter constructors!” Rodney replied hastily.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Excellent, as soon as the Arcturus device is activated and on the verge of an overload, I want you to immediately activate the Attero Device afterwards which will disable every Imperial ship Hyperdrive engine in the galaxy…thus stopping them from escaping,” The general drawled.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Oh my, that is absolutely brilliant,” Rodney breathed in wonderment. He muttered excitedly, repeating the plan over.

<p class="MsoNormal">“The Arcturus device will release exotic particles into the Star Wars galaxy which will eventually destroy the very fabric of reality in that universe. The Attero device will stop their ships from attempting to enter hyperspace and tracing the location of the Arcturus device or attempting to try destroying it before their universe gets destroyed.”

<p class="MsoNormal">“Yes, well why waste resources when the great Rodney Mckay can destroy an entire SW universe by his lonesome,” John Sheppard replied with amusement.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Well I aim to – oh ha ha very funny John. Just another day in at the office and my genius gets underappreciated.” Rodney sulks.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Oh and Rodney, get SG-1 to use to the Time Jumper (puddle jumper with time machine) to track down Doctor Who and fire a couple drones at his silly and rather primitive phone booth,” Shepard ordered as an afterthought.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Ok sure…uh what about the Star Trek universe?” Rodney asks.

<p class="MsoNormal">“Oh them? Not even worth thinking about! Such a technologically backwards people wouldn’t even be considered a threat,” Came Sheppard’s flippant reply.

<p class="MsoNormal">

<p class="MsoNormal">Three days later, the Star Wars universe is destroyed in an epic display. The death toll on the Star wars universe was complete, no survivors remained. Not a single life was lost in the Stargate universe, although Rodney McKay nearly died from an allergic reaction to the citrus he accidently indigested. General John Sheppard was promoted for single-handedly starting and ending a war in five days that hardly costed any resources or money expenditures. Rodney McKay was once again, denied a Nobel Prize for his part and rants about his unappreciated talents as he sits in the basement of Area 51.

<p class="MsoNormal">Doctor Who’s phone booth was destroyed by a dozen drones as the time traveler attempted to escape. Neither the time traveler nor his silly phone booth would ever darken the doorsteps of sci-fi genre again…. Nor the cries of silly fanboy rants could be heard with their beloved worshipfulness destroyed in a flippant manner.

<p class="MsoNormal">In the void of space, a lone replicator survives and latches onto a Borg Cube, only to begin replicating using the materials onboard the ship. The replicator had managed to avoid the wave sent out by the Dakara ancient superweapon, only to be swept away in an unstable vortex that transported it to the Star Trek universe. Within three months, the replicators had amassed a number in the trillions and assimilated the entire Borg collective. Within six months, most of the galaxy including the Alpha Quadrant, have been completely destroyed by the replicators. Within nine months, not a single survivor remained in the Milky way.