User:Glflegolas/Grond

Grond is the hammer of the Underworld, used by the Moderators of the wiki against unruly players. It was first invented by Gen. Grievous1138, and his idea worked so well to dispatch players that he sold his patent to all the moderators of the wiki.

History
Grond first came out in the Late Third Age, when the conflicts between the various races of Middle-Earth began to result in a lot of people posting their idea inside books located inside various libraries in Middle-Earth. By some magic of the Valar, when one book was updated, it would immediately update all other books inside every library (and Hobbit Hole) in the whole realm of Middle-Earth. Unfortunately, not all writers followed the Writers' code of conduct, and soon these books became filled with clutter, graffiti, and random suggestions for how to each side should improve its weapons, armour, soldiers, and fortifications.

Around a month after the Encyclopedia of Middle-Earth was first published, Eru Iluvitar began to find that there was in fact so much random stuff in the book that it was no longer a useful reference. So, he decided to select a few people who would be able to make sure that people followed a few basic rules. It was not an easy choice; he had to select people from both the good and evil sides to eliminate bias. But the end, he was able to come up with a list of several people who could help keep the books readable. These people were Gen. Grievous1138, who originally came from a totally different realm and was to fight for Mordor, Areades, also for Mordor, Sinthoniel, a wise Blue Wizard, and Thorin11 for the Dwarves of the Iron Hills. However, he did not leave them a weapon that they could use to do their duties.

The Invention of Grond
After some weeks of studying, the Mordor moderator, Gen. Grievous1138, came out with a way to deal with these unruly users. In the forges of Mount Doom, he came up with a great warhammer, capable of finding the exact location of the problematic writer, punching through even the strongest armour, and inflicting the Wither effect on any foe it hit for one week. Soon after this hammer was invented, an unruly player was tracked down. Despite the player's best efforts, one hit from Grond knocked him right out for a whole week. The idea worked even better than Gen. Grievous1138 first thought, so he (rather unusually) called all the other moderators to him and stated "I've got a weapon that works against these unruly players. Every time. Would you like to have it, too?" The moderators unanimously agreed. And from this day on, Grond became the weapon of choice for anyone that failed to read the Writers' code of conduct and the Frequently Asked Questions.

Specifications

 * Attack strength: ~10'000 HP (sometimes higher) plus seven days of Wither V Status Effect
 * Uses: ~100'000, but repairable
 * Crafting: Cannot be crafted