Board Thread:Lore Texts/@comment-30645975-20170530042053

I decided to try some longer pieces of poetry, after writing several mid-length poems (1)(2)(3). These deal with the noble folk of Gondor, and the Rangers, both defending against a great evil.

The first piece is an attempt at a sonnet, I fear I did not use the "correct" meter, but rather made up my own. - As I ride upon the hills Flying past the trees do blur. Turning calmly, many mills Convert wind to cloven fir. Then a long-horn fills the air Darkened figures sally forth. Quickly joy turns to despair I turn my steed to bitter north. Whipping quick the wind stirs up Showing Orc-folk drawing near Holding draughts within their cup They scurry fast, they know no fear! Up ahead I spy a towering light It may hide me for the night! --- This next piece is the longest I have ever written, an epic of the hopeless defense of a guard post. --- Proud and tall our tower stood Against the morning sky. Made of marble, braced with wood Our spirits rose so high. As noontide waned we stayed alert Our courage never failed. No trouble we could not avert We crushed the mighty east. Yet like the fabled men of old All wonders soon must end Not from becoming far too bold But failing to defend. The creatures struck within the night Our men were overrun But not quietly dies a great might We fought them, every one. The scouts were slain with longspear blows And failed to give a shout A frightening mob made to enclose So we could not break out. Still valiantly we raised our swords So to our posts arose We sallied for the great warlords And in their fear they froze Then breaking through, we hacked them down But not without a cost Those soldiers who toppled the crown Surely then were lost. Huddling near we locked our shields Prepared to take a stand The greatest of the battlefields Against us now seemed bland. The Orcs leapt forth with flashing blades Several kinsmen fell But as a whole we were not scathed No final death-bell's knell We replied, in turn, with pikes And slew a mighty host But some then fell upon foul spikes Affixed onto a post. Now halved in size our band of men Readied a final strike Each soldier marked out one heathen And swore to end his life. We charged again the warring group And cut across their path Slaying most in one fell swoop That night they felt our wrath. But after that we couldn't run We faced impending doom "Our time on Middle-earth was done" We thought, within our gloom The black-folk lost no time at all, Starting their own huge charge We, like leaves, began to fall Against a group so large So ended a mighty reign Of one ill-fated tower We pray we didn't fall in vain Dear player, use your power! Though we, the guards, have fallen short Of saving all the land Should you happen by this fort We hope this stirs your hand.
 * 1) title:A Rider's Sonnet
 * 2) author:{name:gondor_male}
 * 3) types:gondor,eriador
 * 4) by Campinator
 * 1) by Campinator
 * 1) title:Fall of a Tower
 * 2) author:{name:gondor_male}
 * 3) types:eriador,gondor
 * 4) by Campinator
 * 1) by Campinator

Feel free to leave some criticisms, compliments, or thoughts! In particular, what do you think about the break from story at the end of the second poem? 