All posts by Eureka Enderborn

Oh, crap! I didn't see this post in time! AAAH!

• goes to frantically delete post made

"You... don't, do you? Hang on a sec, do you have a communicator?" A soldier gave him a comm unit. "Hello? Hello? Tell the Prince code 'Hell Yeah!'"

The voice came back through the comm. "Code 'Hell Yeah!'? No way! You actually found outsiders? We're on our way!"

The Dwarf smiles at you. "Reinforcements are headed here now. Wow! Actual surviving Ardans!"

"Ha-ha. You must think I'm an idiot."

"You'll never know unless you try. You could be renowned for being the first man to successfully torture grass. Here." He vanished for a moment. When he reappeared, he set down a 3' by 3' by 3' cube of dirt with grass on top. "Knock yourself out."

As you begin to near Krell space, a message comes in. It is full of static. "Hello? Sir! The situation's bad, sir. Real bad. Those things broke right through our defensive line. They seemed ready for every tactic we'd try against them! They've even made landing on the capital. I had to make this call from a comms room I barricaded, but I don't know if I can... look, I think we're going to have to activate the doomsd--"

You hear a lot of crashing noises, the sound of something sharp being inserted into something fleshy, and then static.

One of them is successfully caught. The battle with the Scourge is seesaw at the moment, it could go either way. The Meta survivor, a Dwarf, is brought before you. He spit at you and says "Do whatever you want to me, pond scum. I'm never going to be a puppet of Salakahn like you mindless fools."

Nor was Legolas.

Master Chief and the Arbiter walk into Mordor, kill Sauron, stuff the ring into Mount Doom, then blow up the Death Star.

"If you're in the mood for violence, go mutilate some grass."

David, you spam my thread with nonsense and heavy use of caps lock, and you expect me to let you join?

"Enough of this!" The UCM councillor yells. "I know I'm certainly not going to listen to another word this disgusting creature has to say!"

"I too have heard quite enough." Sha'tra says. "Guard! Tell Supreme General Barros to triple UGM presence near Krell space, and tell them to be ready for anything. You have gotten your message across, Krell. You may leave now."

The Meta soldiers remaining point at you and shout a few things. Once you are fully engaged in the battle, the Meta survivors begin to flee.

"I do not believe that we have any further use for him." Eureka said, his tone emotionless and immensely casual. "I can put him to sleep. Fear not, I will be entirely humane about it."

The tip of Eureka's spear had appeared very near to the man's throat. It arrived there so fast he appeared to simply not bother with the space between you. "Just a warning, friend. Now, start talking."

It's not very long before they spot a battle. A battle between assorted metas and the Scourge. It is, unfortunately, the tail end of a battle, and the Scourge are winning.

"Once again, there is no need for violence." Eureka stares at Adunahk. Nothing changes, but Adunahk suddenly becomes deeply unsettled. "Please, tell this man you claim is related to you anything he asks you, with honesty. I can tell if you are lying."

What are you talking about? I thought Tue Zygians were on Venus with the Sargoth! And the Sargoth actually don't mind you guys being there, and anybody who tried to kill you would be attacked by the Sargoth in turn.

Eureka puts a hand on the bag. "Your zeal is impressive, hut such a thing will not be necessary. He will tell us what we need in due time without having to resort to unnecessary violence."

Shade and I have spoken, and my character's back in.

"Then that is likely what happened!" The UCM councillor said, standing up. "You were no doubt going to try some form of biological weapon on us, and it backfired. So you came up with a clever little idea to scare us all."

Most eyes were glued to the Krell, so almost no one noticed that the two Razorbird delegates were staring wide-eyed at the container and speaking in hushed tones to the councillor, who was rapidly flipping through what is essentially the Razorbird bible.

When he nears there, a pair of armoured human soldiers with what appeared to be modified Scourge plasma rifles leapt out and held you at gunpoint.

"Well well well. What do we have here? A little whelp trying to get out? Tsk-tsk. Salakahn doesn't like people trying to escape, you know that."

"I think we might have to bring him to the berserkers." The other said with a nasty chuckle. "Move it."